1. On a rainy day, a dog walked into a grocery store. 2. Droplets slid onto the pavement, mixing with the stench of wet trash. Padding his paws against the slippery surface, the dog calmly entered the store. 3. “What on earth is a dog doing in a grocery store?” 1, 2, and 3 all say the same thing in three different ways. Quick quiz: out of 1, 2, and 3, which one tells rather than shows? If you guessed 1, you are right. As you are working on your Common App essay, you may hear advice from teachers who urge you not to write like this, to “show rather than tell” in your essay. This is popular advice you may encounter for most writing assignments. Of course, for your Common App essay, the stakes seem higher. And for personal essays, it is more important than ever to “show rather than tell,” as the more showing you do, the more your readers feel like they are “there” as they read, helping them “get to know you” better. So, what exactly is “showing,” and how do you get better at it? Let’s take a closer look at 2: Droplets slid onto the pavement, mixing with the stench of wet trash. Padding his paws against the slippery surface, the dog calmly entered the store. In these two sentences, we have a couple of things going on. Firstly, we begin with vivid imagery, describing what is going on using strategic adverbs like “slid” and “calmly” and adjectives like “slippery” to give the readers a better visual of the action taking place. Secondly, we are engaging the senses. In the first sentence, we help the readers “smell” the mixture of trash and rain. Finally, we end with the action taking place (the dog entering the store), rather than beginning with it. By the end of these two sentences, the readers know much more about the setting, events, and main character than if we simply wrote, “On a rainy day, a dog walked into a grocery store.” Let’s also examine 3: “What on earth is a dog doing in a grocery store?” While this sentence is less visually descriptive than 2, it is effective in its own way. As you are working on your Common App essay, do not dismiss the power of dialogue. One of the great things about dialogue is that it also places the reader in the action of the story, as they are essentially “hearing” what is going on and what people are saying about the events taking place. In this instance, we know that someone is surprised to see the dog in a grocery store. There are also several clues included here, as well. One, we know that the dog is alone. Two, we know that whoever is looking at the dog probably plans to do something about it and that more action is about to take place. A great Common App essay effectively utilizes dialogue not only to write what people have said but also to lead up to important events or realizations that are about to take place. Remember, your Common App essay should use a combination of vivid language, imagery, and dialogue, but this doesn’t mean that your entire essay has to be about “showing.” Some of the best personal essays strategically “tell” in instances where crucial analyses are taking place. This means that after “showing” what is going on in your essay, you will want to explain what the events mean to you—and this is where it’s okay to “tell.” Just like everything else in your life, writing is about balance. And the best version of your Common App essay should make your readers feel as if they are living your life with you.
